


Things Are Different

by keepasecretgetastrawberry



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-12
Updated: 2016-01-12
Packaged: 2018-05-13 11:58:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5706871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keepasecretgetastrawberry/pseuds/keepasecretgetastrawberry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even though they've found each other, there are still nights where Jean remembers what it was like to lose Marco all over again.<br/>*Spoilers for some of Chapter 77*</p>
            </blockquote>





	Things Are Different

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there! This is a kinda short one shot because I had the idea so why not? It's my first AOT/SNK fic and my first fic on AO3, and it's probably not that great, but hey! Don't know until you try.  
> Please leave feedback and comment/kudos if you enjoyed. Any constructive criticism is welcomed!  
> *SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 77*

There are some nights when he still remembers. 

_"M-Marco? Is that you?"_

It wasn't fair. They were going to the Military Police together; going to the Inner Wall where they would be safe and there were no damn Titans to disrupt anything. 

They were going to be  _together._

Nothing was official between them; they'd established that Marco liked Jean and Jean liked Marco, and they'd exchanged a few kisses and whispered words when everyone else was asleep, but besides that, there was nothing that distinguished them as a couple. 

And now there never would be.

For some reason, the feeling never left him. No matter how many years passed, the hollow ache and twisting sensation just  _wouldn't go._

Eventually, Jean died too. Well, he had to at some point, didn't he?

That was what Jean remembers, anyway. At first he thought he was going insane, dreaming of gigantic monsters and giant walls; then he spotted the dark-haired, freckled boy in the library.

_"J-Jean? Wh- you're here - I thought I was all alone, I - you do remember, don't you?"_

 

At first, Marco only looked at him with confusion, and fear gripped him in a chokehold, fear that he hadn't remembered, and he really was insane, and he was going to be alone remembering forever - and then the confusion had become shock, and then joy, and then he'd opened his mouth and he _had remembered his voice right_ and then it was alright because Marco was there.

_Marco was there._

Predictably, they took a while to get used to each other again. Marco never made any move on him, or any form of romantic advance, so Jean kept quiet about that. Marco was also unwilling to discuss his death, so Jean left that alone too.

Up until they came across Annie, Bertolt and Reiner. 

Jean had reacted to them, of course, because _they betrayed us, they were responsible for so many deaths,_ but not to the extent that Marco had.

He looked so  _afraid,_ shaking and unable to breathe, and tears starting to form and flow down his face, that Jean forgot about starting any confrontation with them and only focused on Marco. 

_Marco._

That was when Marco finally explained that  _it was them, they took my gear and left me alone and then I was eaten and that's how I died._ It was also when Jean kissed Marco for the first time in this world, promising nothing like that would ever happen again, and Marco kissed back.

They'd found each other, finally. 

But Jean still remembers, some nights.

* * *

 

_Marco_

\- The freckled boy saving him, assuring him he was a good leader, parting with a small kiss that lingered -

_Marco_

\- Reiner and Bertolt, discussing something about  _Titans_ and  _the hole we worked so hard to make_ and  _the key we've been searching for_ and _what in the world are you two talking about? -_

_Marco_

_-_ Marco being attacked, and calling for help, and  _why -_

_Marco_

-  _"Annie, why are you doing this?! Annie! **Annie!" -**_

_Marco_

_-_ They take his 3DMG, and  _leave him there_

_Marco_

_\- And then the Titan grabs Marco and then_

**_Marco_ **

_\- And the horrible twisting feeling as he looks down and_

**_Marco_ **

**_Marco_ **

_\- And half of him's gone and_

**_Marco_ **

**_Marco_ **

**_Marco_ **

_\- And he's dead and alone and Jean never told him anything, anything to describe what he felt and_

**_Marco_ **

**_Marco_ **

**_Marco_ **

**_Marco_ **

**_Marco_ **

**_Marco_ **

"MARCO!"

Jean wakes drenched in sweat, his throat sore, and in someone's arms. He fights to get free, to get out because he needs to get to Marco -

"Jean," the someone says, and of course he recognises the voice. "Jean, I'm here, it's over now."

A hand smoothes across his hair, oddly calming. Jean focuses on it until his breathing's slowed, but that's when the tears start. Slow and quiet to start with, but they escalate into hot, fast streams and great hiccupping sobs.

"Ssh, you're safe, I'm safe, we're all safe," Marco's voice soothes in his ear, arms wrapping around him. 

Jean turns to face Marco, because he needs to know for sure, and his hands cup his face as he searches with his eyes for any damage. 

"You're alive," he manages, choking on the lump in his throat.

Marco smiles. "I'm alive." 

_Marco's alive._

Jean repeats it in his head over and over until he believes it, and then allows himself to lean in and rest his head on Marco's chest. 

Marco is alive. That's all that matters.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> When you write 'Marco' over and over again it begins to look really weird


End file.
